Easter was last week and I had a fantastic time back home to visit the famjam. It’d been like…over two years since I got any kind of visit with them, so it was refreshing to see everyone. I come from a close (although dysfunctional) family, especially with me and my brothers…we’re very very close so spending time with everyone was amazing. I got alot of time with everyone – shopping and lunch with my niece, time at home with my mom, bowling with my brother and his gf, partying at my other brothers house…and of course, Easter dinner at my parents home in my hometown. All in all – a great time. Took five days off, basically away from technology (well, aside from twitter on my iphone haha) but yeah..it was nice. I grew up in the country, so I was literally out in the boonies lol.

After my visit though, I found myself short on my goal for the month by a whopping 16k tokens on MFC…of course the recent site troubles on MFC didn’t help either *insert eye roll here* …but yesterday all of you lovely boys came out and supported me and showed more love than I could have expected. I hit my goal on time before the end-of-month cutoff, and shortly after the cutoff, all mayhem ensued. I don’t know what sparked it, what caused it, how it happened or what was going through all of you crazy boys minds but this is what happened:

Which resulted in:

#1 for like an hour! Wewt! I’ve never even cracked the top 100 so this is/was a HUGE accomplishment for me! I want to give a sincere thank you to everyone who made that happen for me…it caused a bit of chest pain, dizziness and confusion (lol) but it was an exhilerating nite that I will never forget! It inspired me and motivated me to work harder to try to reach the goal of Miss MFC.

Tonite has been a bit rough though…not going to lie. I logged on and felt like it was freeloader mania. I ended up logging offline a bit upset, and I know you guys felt that from me so I want to apologize and let you boys know that it wasn’t YOU I was upset with. To the guys who come in my room every nite and are “my boys”..you know who you are…you are the ones who support me no matter what and I appreciate you and your love. When I get upset over nite’s like this, I’m not upset because of you…because you guys are the ones who tip all the time and make my room what it is…tonite I just got upset over the fact that there were 300 guys in my room, most of whom don’t even say hi or how are you, but I knew they were enjoying my barely-there outfit and not showing even a small amount of token appreciation. In the midst of my venture for top 20, and in the afterglow from last nite’s craziness, seeing and feeling like a failure hit me hard, and I had to leave before I started to cry. Again, I’m sorry. I guess with the tits and ass, also comes alot of emotion sometimes. I felt like a failure to myself, to you guys…but tomorrow is another day and even though I know I’ll lose my spot in top 20 tonite (I’m currently sitting at 13) I’ll log on tomorrow and give it another go and see if we can’t get our hiney’s back up there. I want to make you guys proud…so I’ll do everything I can. <3